


Heartbeat

by damaged_danzy



Category: Football RPF
Genre: (is it too early to use that tag??), FC Bayern München, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Real Madrid CF, Romance, Some crying, You'll Be In My Heart, a lot of loving!!, oh and there's a major tarzan moment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-11
Updated: 2017-07-11
Packaged: 2018-11-30 23:15:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11473692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/damaged_danzy/pseuds/damaged_danzy
Summary: James leaves but Cristiano doesn't want him to





	Heartbeat

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for Gabriela with this prompt: _'If you take requests, I would love that you write about crismes, something like[this](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11132265) fanfiction but with cristiano and in a romantic way, I would love to read it because, you know, I am still sure james will leave and cris stays and nobody take the idea to write something about this situation and I think all of us whose love crismes deserve have a fic like this'_ I am soooo sorry it took so long to write this. I hope you enjoy it. But today felt like the right day to write this and I hope it will make you feel a little better :)

Cristiano looked at his reflection in the mirror. James was sitting on the bathroom counter, hoping Cristiano would look at him.

“So, Germany, huh?” Cristiano muttered. He washed the shaving cream off his fact; it was the little areas that he usually missed. He grabbed a washcloth and wiped his face, all while not looking at James.

James had come in the bathroom to watch Cristiano shave. Cristiano usually did it about once a week and watching it made James feel closer to him. James also didn’t have any facial hair, so it had always been interesting to him.

“Yeah. I sign the deal tomorrow.”

“That was fast,” Cristiano said, his face still hidden. His voice was flat, hidden.

James wanted to shout. _Look at me!_ Instead, Cristiano walked out of the bathroom into the bedroom. James followed him silently, sitting on the bed.

Cristiano seemed to know, since he opened the closet and looked around for a few minutes.

 _Cris, look at me!_ James didn’t understand why Cristiano was ignoring him. Cristiano had been one of the only people that James had confided all his secrets to. Cristiano knew that James was having a terrible time at Real. Sometimes James thought that Cristiano knew him better than he knew his own self.

Cristiano finally picked a shirt and put it on. He grabbed a pair of pants and put them on. 

James continued sitting on the bed, just in his boxers. He had spent the night at Cristiano’s. Last night had been wonderful so James didn’t understand what was happening now. It’s not like he kept it a secret that he was leaving. It wasn’t until just a few hours ago that James’ agent had told him that there was finally an official agreement for him to leave. He hadn’t kept any secrets. It did take James an hour or two to warm up to telling Cristiano. James didn’t think he was strong enough to get through it without crying, but he did. But Cristiano ignoring him was not the reaction he thought he would get.

James looked at the clock on the nightstand. It was still early, and James was not in the mood to have the rest of his day ruined. “Cristiano, will you look at me please?”

Silence fell.

It seemed to last an eternity, but actually a minute.

Cristiano finally turned around to face James, but when he did, James regretted asking him to.

Cristiano’s face was red and blotchy and there were tears falling from his eyes. He was looking everywhere but at James’ face. “I.. I don’t want you to leave.”

James stood up and walked to Cristiano. He grabbed his face and wiped the tears away. “If anybody should be crying, it’s me. Cris, what’s wrong? We’ve talked about it before.”

Cristiano sniffled as James sat them both on the bed. “I just never thought this day would come,” he confessed, his voice thick with emotion. “I never wanted you to leave.”

James’ heart broke. Every time they had spoken about the idea of him leaving, James was the one who cried and Cristiano was the one who comforted him. Now that the roles were reversed, James felt guilty.

“I’m sorry Cris. I thought you were okay with this. You were the one telling me that it was for the best.”

Cristiano took a deep breath. “I did and I still believe that. That’s why I feel terrible. I want you to stay even though you deserve more.”

“Aw Cris, no. Please, I never asked for any of this. Things just haven’t been working out for me. That’s life.”

Cristiano nodded. “I know. But I wanted you to stay for me. You’re my forever James.”

James didn’t know what to say. He looked at the floor at the little rays of sunshine that were fighting their way through the curtains. Sure, Cristiano had told him he loved him countless times, but to hear that he was Cristiano’s ‘forever’, that was something else. James felt a lump form in his throat, but he swallowed it, knowing that him crying too wouldn’t help anything. Instead, James caressed Cristiano’s face, feeling the smoothness of it. He smiled when his fingers skimmed over the rough part that Cristiano always seemed to miss.

“Who’s going to watch me shave now?” Cristiano asked, smiling for the first time. 

James laughed. “Hmm, maybe ask Dani.”

Cristiano laughed too. “Yeah, cause he shaves _all_ the time.”

The two of them giggled and Cristiano’s tears eventually went away. His face was still red, but the sparkle that he normally had in his eyes were back. Cristiano pulled James into his lap and nuzzled his face into the crook of James’ neck. “What am I going to do without my baby?”

James rubbed Cristiano’s back in little circles. “I’m still here. You’re stuck with me.”

Cristiano pulled back. He ran his fingers through James’ hair. “I’m glad you dyed your hair back black.”

James scoffed. “Why?”

“I’m more into brunettes.”

James laughed. “You idiot.” He kissed Cristiano’s cheek and pulled away. “Was that a deal breaker or something? If I kept the blond hair you would have broken up with me?”

Cristiano raised an eyebrow playfully. “Sounds about right. I was giving you one more week to go back black or else I was kicking you to the curb.”

James rubbed the top of Cristiano’s head. “Well at least I have hair.” He stuck his tongue out.

“Ha ha, very funny,” Cristiano replied sarcastically, blushing. His smirk went away and he grabbed James tight. “James, I love you. I want you with me all the time.”

“Cris, I know. But we’ll still be together. Millions of people are in long-distance relationships and make it work.”

“I know,” Cristiano replied, fiddling with the top of James’ boxers. “But I want you here. Like on top of me, the way that you are. And not just sexually,” he quickly added, “but to have and to hold. Who else am I going to snuggle with when it’s cold? You’re feet are always cold and I know nobody else is going to put up with that in bed,” Cristiano finished with a small smile. “And your soft hands.. Who’s going to hold them now? Who’s going to make sure that you have your breakfast in the morning and your coffee just the way you like it?” Cristiano blinked rapidly. “James, that person is me, and only me.”

James’ lips trembled. He wanted nothing more than to kiss Cristiano. But he knew that they had to talk face to face while they still had the time. “Cristiano, I love you. And I know you love me too. There could be a million miles between us and I would think of nobody but you. Yes you take care of me, but I’ve managed to do well for the past twenty-five years on my own. Of course I wish you would still make my coffee with just the amount of sugar. I wish you would give me all your mom’s secret Portuguese desert recipes. I wish I could wrap you up in my pocket and fly you with me to Germany. But unfortunately they don’t make pockets six feet deep.” He paused for a second. “I just want you to know that I will always be waiting for you. I will always be here. I’m not going anywhere. We may not see each other physically, but I will always feel you in my heart.” He grabbed Cristiano’s hand and placed it over his bare chest. “As long as my heart is beating, it belongs to you.”

Cristiano didn’t say anything but he kissed his hand that was over James’ chest. He didn’t have to say anything; James felt it all. He and Cristiano had always had an unspoken connection. From the first time they met, there were a million words between them, each syllable hanging on the other one’s tongue. When they kissed for the first time, it was like everything they had ever wanted to say to each other was shouted from a rooftop. The first time they said I love you, Cristiano blurted it out so suddenly and loudly it scared James. The first time they made love, Cristiano would deny it, but there were many tears shed. The first goodbye would be hard, but the first hello would be the sweetest.

Cristiano and James stayed in bed the rest of the day. There were more tears shed, more teasing each other, more laughter, more touching, and more kissing. 

They would be miles apart, but when you love somebody like the way they loved each other, then distance didn’t matter.

Every heartbeat of James and Cristiano was a step closer to being back to each other.

**Author's Note:**

> I knew that James would be leaving, but I can't believe today is the DAY. I'm very excited for his future and I know James can only go up. I will miss his friendships/relationships with the RM players so much. But Crismes will live through my (bad) fanfics, so don't worry. Just trying to cheer some people up :)


End file.
